By Julie Bergher

Love.  Everyone loves Love.  But what is Love?  Where do you find it?  How do you know when you’ve got it?  How do you keep it if, in fact, you’ve figured out that you have it?  What is love?
Remember the last time you felt something similar to new Love?  There was probably a sense of urgency to be with this new person.  Days were brighter, song lyrics were more meaningful, time didn’t move quickly enough.  Days seemed to drag on and on until you saw each other again and then the time spent together flew by!  Is that Love?
Can Love be the desire to inhale every aspect of the other?  Each word, each movement, the sound of the other’s voice and laugh all become the focus of your thoughts.  Is that Love?
My friend, Safiya, met a man online.  He lived quite a distance away but she liked his profile and answered his email.  They wrote for only a couple of days before exchanging phone numbers.  The conversations were, as she put it, all consuming.  She felt that he knew her already, or had known her all their lives without ever meeting.  They were in sync on everything.  Unfortunately, their jobs prevented them from getting together until two weeks from the writing of this article… almost four months after the first email!  Six weeks into this “relationship” they began Skyping.  Their video conversations would last hours each Saturday and Sunday morning.  They got into the habit of talking on the phone during their morning commutes – 30 minutes to an hour each day!  I couldn’t call her at lunch anymore.  She was on the phone with Him.
Sometime between phone calls and Skyping, he declared his love for her.  They decided on a date when she would fly out to finally see him, but she was already in Love.  Or was she?  Can you really Love someone you’ve never physically met before?  Can conversations alone bring out true feelings of Love?  It seems too difficult for me to answer.  Is Love something knowing, or something you feel?
It wasn’t that long ago that people married before any physical contact was permitted.  Long conversations were the way two people would get to know each other, usually under the watchful eye of a chaperone.  There was no “dating”, certainly not the way we do it today!  No kissing, touching, playing around or, heaven forbid, living together first to see if it’s right.  Granted, divorce was rarely an option for those couples who made mistakes, but it shouldn’t be such an easy option now for those who marry, even after years of living together.  Safiya is seriously considering marrying this man.  She loves everything about him.  They will know each other better than any other couple I know – who haven’t even kissed yet.  It’s probably the most romantic real life story I’ve ever heard or told.  
Safiya is my age, early 50’s.  It gives one hope that pure, true love is always waiting for those who still believe in it.